CONVINCE THE OTHER SIDE
In this week’s Parsha, Nitzavim Vayeilech, we are given the mitzvah and the opportunity of teshuvah. The Torah writes “this mitzvah is not far away, it is in your heart and in your mouth to do it”. This implication is that teshuvah is not that difficult; all it needs is the heart.
Many people, myself included, often feel frustrated when during this period of the year we make commitments quite earnestly and are unable to keep them for any long duration of time. One suggestion is to make small changes so we have a better chance of keeping them for a longer period. I would like to suggest an additional approach.
There are two advisors within every one of us. Our physical side is drawn to material aspirations. Our Godly side is drawn to Godly aspirations. For the sake of this article we will refer to the former as ‘the other side’. We find ourselves in a constant conflict. With many of the choices that confront us we allow one side or the other to make the decision. If I decide to dedicate myself to a year of spiritual growth and therefore limit the amount of ice cream I will have, every time ice cream is presented my other side will argue that she never agreed to this arrangement; and she is correct! With every serving of ice cream I am waging a battle. Naturally, sooner or later I will fall.
Perhaps, if I could get my other side on board with this limited ice cream plan I would not have to contend with her argument each time; she already agreed to it. (I use ice cream only as an example, naturally it applies to every issue that will raise contention.) The only question is how do I get her on board?
A year ago I met Michael Poteshman, a wonderful person with whom I became very close. Michael is a successful individual in many ways. At one point in his life his health was suffering miserably and anything the doctors did for him only made his condition worse. Finally, he dedicated an entire year studying the effects of the many ingredients used in the production of processed foods to see if he could find the solution to his problems. His research paid off and he is now in extremely good health with no medications whatsoever! I am grateful to Michael for the book he authored which explains in great detail and with much research what those ingredients do to our bodies.
After meeting with Michael and reading his book, I suddenly had no problem limiting my intake of ice cream, which I still enjoy very much. Why? Because my other side was on board. There was no conflict. Although I still enjoy ice cream, I successfully educated my other side about the consequences of my ice cream intake and my other side agreed that it was not in her interest either. No conflict!
Every person who recognizes the benefits of being close to HaShem and the work that is required to achieve that closeness will concede that it is truly worth the investment. The difficulty we often have is maintaining the clarity of those benefits. As we approach Rosh Hashanah and then Yom Kippur followed by Succos it is not too difficult to maintain that clarity. However, as we continue our trek through the year we lose that clarity and we begin to question if it is truly worth the investment. The difficulty in keeping the ice cream plan comes from losing the clarity. The successful teshuvah plan must include a continuing education component by which to keep the other side on board with the general plan.
The heart is considered the organ of awareness and clarity. The Torah is telling us that teshuvah is not difficult, it is all in the heart. While Patrick Henry proclaimed “Give me liberty or give me death”, the Jew proclaims “Give me clarity or give me death.”
Have a very safe and very wonderful Shabbos.
Paysach Diskind